Never use a cloud-based phone.

You’ll end up with mist calls.

If you need a referee, you can't go wrong with a barbarian. They will judge things ferally.

Bonus #DadJoke
What do you call an Irish spider?
(Paddy Long Legs.)

(It's #HootinTootinTuesday again! Post some jokes or funny memes under this hashtag today, and bring lots of smiles to #Mastodon.)

Bonus #DadJoke
Remember… St. Patty's Day puns don't just shame me, they Seamus all.

(It's #HootinTootinTuesday again! Post some jokes or funny memes under this hashtag today, and bring lots of smiles to #Mastodon.)

St. Patrick’s Day is on Monday, so I thought I'd get a head start with some fun memes…

(It's #HootinTootinTuesday again! Post some jokes or funny memes under this hashtag today, and bring lots of smiles to #Mastodon.)

A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.

I wrote a book about the first car I ever owned. It’s an auto biography
#nerlingersjokes #puns #dadjokes

My partner and i made a huge ankylosnowrus

I used to have a job at a calendar factory but I got the sack because I took a couple of days off.

Scientists have discovered that ants don’t get sick...

And it’s all thanks to their anty-bodies.

Dad jokes are only for people who aren't fully groan! #DadJokes #puns